Ever feel like something will happen? Or like it did happen or is happening?
Or just any weird feeling?
Something always does happen, because things happen. But does it mean anything to have a weird feeling?
I've heard a lot about people feeling dead inside. Empty. Devoid of sadness and any other emotion, rather than being so sad. Unaccomplished.
Honestly, this is one reason I love myself so much: I have a lot of feelings.
Gay in the lamest sense, I know. Feelings suck right? But do they?
Happiness is possible in many forms, each worthwhile in their own right.
The joy of sexual pleasure is unique from both the pleasure of a tasty taste and a full belly, and each of the latter are unique from each other. Or how about love?
And aside emotions, how about thoughts, perhaps even existentialism. Deja Vu, conspiracy, Fate, whatever.... Hard to find the words sometimes, and sometime I forget a specific idea.
"Someone else might think a better way to phrase it anyway, just let it be. Ok." and I get on with my day.
Or the most basic thoughts.
Thoughts can be scary or inspiring or any other thing that creates an emotion.
But all of these can be so unpleasant. The most amazing physical pleasure known to humanity is unequal to the worst pain either for frequency or intensity, maybe both.
Love of your daughter for ten years and your wife for 14... met with 60 years of grieving losses caused by a careless driver.
Creativity, hope, generosity... met with closed minds, despair, and selfishness.
Selfishness, btw, turns this all around.
Along with sadism, it can make for an enjoyable life. I like to think I'm a good person. Pragmatically speaking, it makes sense that if you view the worst that happened to you as a part of How Things Are, and you enjoy the pain inflicted on everything else, or at least don't take a personal toll from it, it's easier to increase the ever important "Happiness Score" because you lost if you're feeling negative emotions. On the other hand, this flips back around again.
Full circle, negative emotions enable positive ones. I'm not one to say suffering is needed in the world, but painful times often have a silver lining and occasionally are net positives.
At an old age, a basketball court is opened in memory of he deceased mother and daughter, and people take note that driving accidents have gone down, and technological improvements enable more people to be together for longer, if they choose.
Do your instincts ever tell you anything? What feelings do you get, like something really good or bad will happen? Regret or nostalgia? Agony or euphoria?
As a hobby, I work with animals a lot and take care of animals.
I can always tell as soon as I walk into the room if an animal is dying or has died before I check the enclosures.
I was at a friend's house and her dog walked up to me and I caught the feeling of death. I didn't say anything, but a few days later she found out her dog had cancer. She was expected to live another month. I visited again a few days later and I knew her dog only had two weeks. Somehow I turned out to be right. I can't explain it. And I don't even need to be in the same building someone's to know one of my animals is going to die. I just know and I rush over.
I know, I sound like a terrible animal keeper but I have a lot of animals I care for and breed and this is over the last 7 years.