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Srsly stfu pls.

It's storming here. I love it. I love a lot of things, it's a cool universe. But I'm also full of hate. Sometimes, I feel guilty, too. But not over porn, no matter how violent or depraved.

You're not a child, stop feeling bad about it. I say this woth good intentions, not to talk down to you, though I'll admit to not being the best... diplomat.

Something like snuff or child porn, if you're supporting that, even indirectly, sure feel bad and stop. At least try to stop. Support ways to end all that horror. If you care to, which if something in you makes you feel bad, you do on some level.

If you don't feel bad about it, this message isn't for you. Poopy.




I see you are into necro.

Does this person still feeling guilty?


But feeling guilty is my kink


I’m not guilty about my kink but i’m embarrased to say it to others who don’t have kinks of their own or the same interest of mine.


I must say I agree. I don’t feel guilty typically

But when ur feeling down, looking for something to feel guilty about...Idk this is a pretty easy candidate.

Not the porn, just the desires behind it, and the irrational worry of someday hurting someone


I don't understand. Why would you feel guilty about such trivial things?

I mean I get it, if someone just jerked off to some messed up stuff, and is realising it's wrong. But after 10 minutes same shit will be hot again, so it's just a temporal cock block. Thus that guilt is aimed at the kink, not the deed itself.

You can't change your sexuality and your fetishes. Being ashamed of any of that is stupid.


Do you refer to people jerking off true snuff and pedo movies or just generic guro drawings.

In the first case they should feel bad since they're indirectly hurting a human being but in the second one, they shouldn't cause it's just some random drawing of messed up things that hurt no one.



How exactly can you hurt someone by watching a pirated movie?

In fact, according to the movie industry people must be hurting CP producers by watching their porn without paying LOL and if we want o hurt them more we should do even more pirating, making it totally unprofitable to produce that kind of content.


I had drawings and kinky stuff in mind, but I guess it's the same with true snuff and CP.
That's who you are, you can't change it. So feeling guilty is pointless.
Also you did nothing bad to those poor people (apart from being very disrespectful), so it's ok.

I believe there is a difference between feeling guilty for jerking off to shit, and feeling permanent guilt just because of hardcore fetishes.

As long as person doesn't hurt others directly or indirectly, I don't see reason to feel guilt.


Not like I disagree, but more and more people watch movies illegally, yet movies budgets and actors pays are bigger than ever. Hollywood is doing fine despite piracy.

Also growth in CP pirate downloads could lead producers to a conclusion, that market is growing, and they need to film even more of this shit. And film it better, make it more extreme, more appealing, so they can compete with pirates.


>>And film it better, make it more extreme, more appealing, so they can compete with pirates.
this does not make much sense because producers cannot compete with pirates. Pirates are not producing stuff, Pirates are competing with distributors, not with producers.

Piracy was really big deal for certain studios like LS magazine where all their quite expensive content was getting freely available on the internet.
You can see those producers thing about pirates ruining their business. So people who wight with CP availability on the internet are doing them a big favor. This is exactly was ht CP producers want: their content being taken down from free access.



I would like to know Pestilence's opinion on that matter. Not like he has anything to do with CP, but he is a professional creator of a niche product.
How would increased piracy of his stuff affected his business?
Would his patreons just ditched him, and went for freebies? Or maybe majority would keep their support, despite that?
And also at the same time more people would learn about him. Obviously a lot of people would download his vids for free.
But I'm pretty sure there would be quite few in that group willing to pay, so he can do his thing, providing them with new cool stuff.
So there is a chance, he would actually profited from that.

Demand is bigger than supply. And I can see, how the same can goes for CP.


This is similar to the soft drugs issue. Legalisation and slight government control seems to work. So maybe it is the right way for fighting CP.

But again! Porn is not the problem. The child abuse is. Don't you think free and easy access to CP could encouraged homegrown "producers" to do their own stuff and post it on the web?

As a side note, I've read somewhere, that porn industry was harmed more because of amateur porn, than illegal downloads.


This is a slightly different issue because stuff like cp is not that safe to buy and you need to be pretty desperate to do a monetary transaction and lose anonymity. Sure there will be people who just want to support creators but this is kinda dangerous.

In any case, when you are fully satisfied with enough content there is not much desire to buy something new
this is the more likely reason why the porn industry is dying, they just do not have any new ideas to produce as we already have more content than we could ever consume in multiple lives.

Amateur porn is moving into niche areas since nobody will ever buy plain sex today.

If CP downloading and hosting was legalized we just had no more need to make new content because there is enough already. I guess it may be shifting to the niche areas as well, with more extreme acts.

If we think about homegrown products being posted on the web this is actually a good thing because you get a better understanding of what is going on and also why anyone would object criminal posting evidence of his crime online? What it is good for is same stuff happens behind closed doors and nobody ever finds out about that? Even if you don't find the criminal you at least get some statistic.
Imagine if rapists or robbers started posting their videos online, that would make police work much easier. I would even slash the prison time in half for those who were nice enough to post evidence on their own initiative LOL



I don't know, how buying CP looks like, but I believe it is done with bitcoins, or by purchasing something legit with the CP as an addition.
Also I think those are closed groups, sharing info about CP producers and sources only among trusted members. Of course it's dangerous, but most pedos are caught because of provocations and easy accessible CP downloads. At least in my country.

>> In any case, when you are fully satisfied with enough content there is not much desire to buy something new

I can't agree. Even this site is literally proving statement above wrong. You can't be satisfied with addiction, and porn is very addictive. It doesn't matter, how many GB of data I have, I want more. I want new stuff, even if old stuff is hot af.

I agree with you about porn industry. They are indeed out of ideas. If they went for slightly kinky and weird stuff, maybe they would be able to turn the tables tho.
About amateur porn - I don't know. Perhaps, but streams and camshows still looks rather popular. And it was hurting porn industry because it was free alternative, desroying their monopoly.

As I've wrote in my previous post, maybe free download and hosting would hurt them, or maybe it wouldn't. But there have to be A LOT of CP out there, to stop people from wanting new stuff. There is so many porn, but it's so hard to find the right one. It's not like one video per day, two day a week. You can go through several dozens of videos, before you find one you like. And you always want more.

Your last point was pretty good. Maybe it would be for the better. Even if some people holding back before now started abusing their kids in front of camera, authorities could catch overall more pedos, and at the end of the day it would help more children.


>>It doesn't matter, how many GB of data I have, I want more. I want new stuff, even if old stuff is hot of.
You kinda got it wrong, because I was talking about BUYING stuff not about trying to find something new

what we do here is more like research as the main idea is not even so much to get something that you want but to get something new.
as for example some time ago I had free access to torture galaxy for several years long and it ended with the result that I lost interest in that stuff.

essentially this is how it all goes for me: I get interested in something then lose that interest and focus on something else.

Considering the amount of cp available, that's the pretty huge amount. It will be in the range of many terabytes and many many hours if videos. you will get bored pretty soon unless we try to find something very unusual. That amount is growing quite rapidly regardless of all prosecutions.

Another funny thing is that modern CP is produced by children themselves because it is pretty easy to set up a webcam and earn some easy money or that is also a pretty good way to get some attention. Even funnier is that children are prosecuted for producing and distributing CP as some hardcore criminals making it unclear who exactly is the victim here.


I think buying and piracy belongs to the same category. Those are just means to obtain something. Some will steal, some will pay.

I understand your concept of "reasearching". I'm probably doing similar thing, because I collect guro, ryona and alternative hentai , without masturbating to it. That being said, I still want more, and you also want more.
While you want new things, new interests, you are still looking it in this, let me call it, genre. It's not like violence, and old kinks lost their appeal for you, right?

Interests may change, but the archetype stays the same. Person digging CP will be picky just like anybody else, and his/hers hunger be everlasting just anybody's else. As I've stated, this is addiction.

I don't know, how much there is CP out there. I know it was pretty common on the deep web, but I never touched that stuff. If you are right about humongous amount of CP, than maybe legalising hosting and downloading CP for own usage would be solution. Especially if kids are making this shit themselves. But if half of available CP is from 1980, or features bathing babies, than nope.

This funny fact is very interesting! It's 16 years old having sex with 15 years old situation. 16 years old will be treated as a pedophile. That's some great moral dillema.
If said kid cooked meth instead of filming CP, would this be any different? He know, he is making illegal stuff, and he will be punished, if he get cought. With meth he is indirectly hurting someone, but filming his own body is harmless. But you can say this is prostitution, which is illegal in many countries.


>>While you want new things, new interests, you are still looking it in this, let me call it, genre. It's not like violence, and old kinks lost their appeal for you, right?
Actually no, I am interested in practically all possible fetishes that exist and do not exist yet. So if someone will make porn of trannies dressed as chicken having sex in the supermarket I will be very pleased to put it into my collection and masturbate to that as well. Japan makes a lot of that stuff. Furthermore, if I am in the relationship with someone who is enjoying any kind of fetish I will enjoy that same thing just because another person is enjoying it as if felling it though that another person.

I don't know how other people fell, but it looks like this is not that uncommon, usually when you get plentiful availability of any kind of porn you develop an infinite number of perversions.
In some time ago I never imagined that I may be interested in the certain things and now that turned to be my main focus. I think I even became bisexual or more like pansexual LOL

I did some research on CP as well, and the fact is that it is extremely boring there are only very few videos or pictures that are well done or feature something interesting. The only reason to be interested in that is that this is kinda hard to get and you must have that in your collection as an extreme oddity.

But there is also another funny side that there is guro version of CP which they call "hurtcore". Unlike consensual porn where those kids are happy hurtcore is pretty legal and can be found on the plain internet.
it is funny to see that simulated adult rape is being banned while fapping to kids being dismembered, beaten or committing suicides is totally normal. So people who are into Cp guro have a pretty big advantage over pedophiles LOL

As for those 12-year-old kids making porn, this is a bit more retarded because they are not engaging in prostitution they are most often just sharing pictures with their boyfriends/girlfriends. If 12-year-old girl sent her naked picture to her 13-year-old boyfriend, legally that counts as CP distribution and she may get in jail. Sure, later many of those pictures leak when relationships end and angry teenagers spread all their collections on the internet or merely when they want to brag to each other about their success.


I don't know, if the first part was intended to be funny, but it made me laugh. Not the fetish itself, but the conclussion:
>> I will be very pleased to put it into my collection and masturbate to that as well.
Sadly ONLY Japan makes stuff like that. I need one day take some time off, and look for weird shit like that.

Infinite number of perversions - yes, but didn't those perversions come from the static, unchangeable archetype? There was thread about being neglected as a child, and we tried to explore that area. What caused our fetishes, and are we able to get new one? I've seen almost everything, and I found attractive only those things, that were derivatives of my initial prefferences.
Maybe everybody is different on that matter, maybe I've just kinda encountered all my fetishes as a kid, and that's why I'm aware of these archetypes? I don't know. At the same time I know my straight ex switched to being lesbian for some time, after we break up (not for long, though).

I wouldn't call that reaserches. I was looking for redrooms, some controversial books, and weird shit. Stumbling upon CP was purelly accidental, and I've always stayed away from that. I did my share in baby-sitting, changing diapers, helping wiith baths, so I've seen enough of naked babies and young kids;).
I don't go to deep web, because I've learned there is nothing there, that I can't find on normal internet.

Good point. Vids with beaten, killed and humiliated children are all over the place. There is so much on popular shock sites. But I don't like those. Too sad.

Well then, sharing someone's nude pics and vids as a revenge or to show off should be prosecuted. This is a bad thing, and there should be consequences.
Sending staff to bf/gf at this age also should be sort of illegal. You don't know what you are doing, when you are 13. I'm not talking about sending horny kids to jail, but some kind re-educastion about sex, privacy and responsibility.


Yes it was intended to be funny, same way as comedy show;)

But your source of fetish is a bit limited, yes some of our fetishes come from our childhood. Like I don't know why but my first sex story was fairytale about the witch who mutilated herself. Slo people getting stabbed in the belly. But I never associated that with pain or torture for me it was just erotic fun If someone is getting cut stabbed or mutilated I totally do not see that as something painful because I never experienced that myself and thus I cant know how it feels in my imagination being stabbed feels similar as if woman gets penetrated in her vagina.

But this is just one source, the next source is empathy, I can imagine myself in the place of another character and take that character mentality for myself feeling what that character is supposed to feel this is how those other fetishes develop you just imagine yourself in the place of that masochist woman who feels pain as pleasure and feel that pleasure yourself while in reality, you hate that or you just enjoy attention you get from other imaginary characters. that way you can adopt any fetish as long as there is another character or better living person who likes that, but this is also why I don't like suffering unless there are other characters to whom I can relate to feeling their pleasure or if there is some abstract idea which makes all that worthwhile.

that's why You can even change your gender or sexual orientation like it is totally possible to imagine yourself as a gay, lesbian, or straight woman and enjoy all that those people enjoy by yourself.
This is also why I like lolicon as I prefer to imagine myself as a child in my fantasies.

>>Sending staff to bf/gf at this age also should be sort of illegal. You don't know what you are doing, when you are 13. I'm not talking about sending horny kids to jail, but some kind re-educastion about sex, privacy and responsibility.

this is where I greatly disagree, in fact, lack of sex in my childhood is what made me hate society and the whole world as much as I hate them now.
This is, the reason why my fantasy is to destroy society and all those puritans sending them into the worst hell possible for depriving me of sex in the age when my sexuality was at its peak.
in my opinion, children should be told how to have sex at that same time when they learn to speak they should do that nonstop with everyone until they become adults because sex is most pleasant thing wahst you can have this is like the meaning of life.

and I am talking not about achieving orgasms but about sex with continues for multiple hours a day in the strangest forms. Every activity should be sexualized. People do not even imagine what they are missing and how much pleasure this could bring in the life.


Thing with childhood and fetishes is like chicken vs egg scenario. For me it seems, like I've always enjoyed women in peril. Even before my childhood turned to shit. But I can't be sure. I know everything I like now is just variation of things, that always turned me on. Guro is just different kind of peril, humiliation, powerlessness, which my sadistic side like. Fem dom, female pov, strap on role play etc are hot because of my guilt, but also I remember even in my pre-teens I wanted to obey, and be treated like dirt, by some pretty girl.
But again, those fetishes could be a derivative of my childhood suffering. Sadism extracted from my anger, and masochism come to life as a cope mechanism.
Even my newfound interest in shota comes from my childhood, and is based on humiliation, as I was dreaming about being sexually abused by young adult women, when I was horny little kid. Yes, there are stuff with shotas dominating over women, and I like that very much, because it's super humiliating for female, so it's pleasing for the other side of the spectrum.

I'm very empathic, but I can't do this. My gf like risky sex in public, but it's impossible for me, to feel the same. I don't find that appealing at all. If something isn't connected to my initial kinks, I can't find that hot.
Were you able to do 180 degrees spin with empathy about something fundamental, basic?

>>Sending staff to bf/gf at this age also should be sort of illegal. You don't know what you are doing, when you are 13. I'm not talking about sending horny kids to jail, but some kind re-educastion about sex, privacy and responsibility.

No, no, you got it all wrong:).
I'm not against sex at that age. I'm against doing it irresponsibly. Use condoms, don't do things your partner doesn't want you to do, don't record with hidden cam, remember it's something special, and you should treat this that way. Apart from that - do whatever you want.

Are children should be told to do sex? I don't think so. But only because it could indirectly force someone to having sex, despite for him/her being not ready. It should be own choice. Without shaming and passive-aggression.
Kids should be presented with objective facts, necessary knowledge and free choice to have or have not sex as they please.

Law and mojority society are always behind progress.


>>I'm very empathic, but I can't do this. My GF like risky sex in public, but it's impossible for me, to feel the same. I don't find that appealing at all. If something isn't connected to my initial kinks, I can't find that hot.
Were you able to do 180 degrees spin with empathy about something fundamental, basic?

well that the whole idea that if you are not interested in risky public sex your girlfriend is interested, so you can do something like putting the remote controlled vibrator in her and make her do risky things while you yourself stay safe and do nothing of that.

Then, you go outside and you see her arousal and feel aroused yourself using her as a proxy while you yourself may have zero interest in that thing and stay safe.
but when you do that several times or just imagine doing that to someone imagining how that person will feel you may even start liking it done to you as well.
funny thing is that you have no clue how it feels or what it is, but you just know that this is something that must feel good and your fantasy will do the rest of the work. As If you use a vibrator on your girfriend you definitely cannot know how does it feels but you see her expressions you see her pleasure and you know that it must be good when that is done to you.

I kinda disagree with your idea of fetish origins, because from my own experience and from what other people say this is different.
one interesting thing is that you do not need any traumas to like or dislike things. you simply copy likes or dislikes of other people in your childhood.

For example, if your mother displayed disgust towards the certain thing you will likely copy her disgust and feel it same. Something like one sentence "bad boys have to be spanked" said by your mother (or not even said but implied) will be cemented in your mind forever unquestionable truth on the emotional level.

as for me, my mother once said something bad about bald people I kinda misunderstood that but from that moment I feel disgusted for bald heads and even feel fear if I see some bald person. I am kinda prepared to defend myself also, It somehow happened that my father somehow displayed his lust towards big breasts and this got transferred to me as well. I had absolutely zero interest in breasts but then I just decided to try it and yes that worked.
This is how we learn what is shameful what is good and what is bad
we totally ignore what our parents demand us to do but we take everything that they feel.
If your mother will start crying you will be hurt much more than if she was spanking you.
I found one story on the internet where kids decided to play dead to tease their mother, but when she almost lost her mind that was most traumatic experience in that person's life. there was no punishment of any kind no scolding no complaints and yet it was worse than anything that.

I grew up in the extreme absence of any kind of sexual information and only learned about how kids are made in the puberty from the medical book about sexology. Imagine was surprise it was for me that my parents did something that disgusting. LOL In my childhood I was doing many of those extreme things you see on Japanese movies, because I had no clue what I am even supposed to do I was masturbating in the wet clothes trying to wear pants on my head, masturbating while hanging upside down lying between 2 chairs in the air and other strange poses as I just had no clue what I am doing but I was trying to find out how to do it the best way and it all worked great.

This proves that what matters is just the expectations. You simply believe that something must feel good and it does feel good. If you will believe that gay sex feels good you will love it unless it will happen to be painful. the more you fantasize about something the more interested in that you get.

I do not say that children have to be forced to have sex, they must be just told how to do that and then they should be left to learn it on their own. What matters is that both girls and boys must be told that they must cooperate in trying to please each other this is is the most important idea here, that instead of hurting each other and fighting yours have to bring pleasure to each other and invent a better way to do that. Status should be gained not by hurting people and proving yourself to be strongest and most successful but by your ability to please other people and the best way to please is to have sex.
However, it must not be something plain as achieving orgasm it has to be a complex thing when children would develop multiple fetishes and invent very ingenious and complex ways to do it and control themselves to extend that pleasure. Our sexuality is not in our body but in our brains, it is in our fantasy.


I've told her few months ago, that I'm planning to buy Hitachi Magic Wand and Bullut Vibrator, and I've got a big NOPE as a response;).

I mean yes, you don't need anything spectacular, violent or painful. All it takes is ultimately just one stimulus. Like in those examples you provided. I totally agree with that part.

But getting new fetishes due to fantasizing how good something is, looks like reversed behavioral therapy for curing homosexuality or that one from Clockwork Orange. I think, there needs to be already some fundation for new kink to appear. Like progression from point A to point B. Some connection. I don't see plausible getting, for example, guro fetish out of blue. Without finding it's elements interesting before. That's my point. There must be something linking your adult perversions with each other and/or with childhood fascinations.

My mother is quite progressive, so I had comic book about sex'n'stuff when I was like 12-13, and I even saw transection image of intercourse in encyclopedia when I was younger, but just like you, I didn't know what I was doing. I think this is normal. Most guys I know had weir experiments with masturbation. One even damaged his dick pretty badly.
Or perhaps that was normal. Nowadays every kid can look things up on the web.

I did not said, you want to force kids to sex, but I feel, like even encuoraging them to try, can lead to shaming ones, who aren't ready yet. Just like with your examples about small, meaningless remarks leading to developing prejudice, sympathy or antypathy towards someone or something.
Teaching them stuff, and removing moral obstacles would be enough in my opinion.

I like your vision of society. That would be truly wonderful.
BTW, you may want to read "Lost Girls" by Alan Moore. He got similar message. Very cool and hot comic book.


Well, why do you think you can't develop fetish out of nothing?

Speaking about myself I had absolutely no interest in scat or pee in my childhood or anything anal at all also I was quite homophobic. but now I like that stuff and I could even consider myself bisexual.
In the same way, I had no interest in BDSM I was not even looking to bdsm pictures on the internet in the beginning
In fact, I was mostly interested in big breasts at first but now lolis are preferable (even if some time ago I hardly could imagine myself being interested in such thing.)

I can remember being interested in guro from quite early time and I still don't even know why but most of my current interests were developed later and when I got interested in roleplaying even more stuff was added to my list.

I also agree that children should not be pushed or demanded to have sex (and actually not even told how to do that because you derive them from lost of fun to discover it on their own)
but this CP ban is nothing else than denying them right to do it when they want it themselves. the real reason why it is forbidden is not to protect children but to prevent them finding out about that kind of pleasure.
Children are routinely beaten tortured and abused in the families but this is totally ok, however, if in some family child is actually told about pleasures of sex those parents will be sent to jail because other parents are horrified that this child will teach their children about that as well.

The main ideology is that sex has to be sold for money, and even "slut shaming" comes from the same source where girls who give it for free are shamed for not being wholes and not demanding proper payment
The thing children do not understand yet is that they are not supposed to do it just for the pleasure they have to sell/buy it.


I don't feel guilty, just frustrated and alienated. It's difficult as hell to find the sort of material I crave, and this in turn makes me question why I crave it.


Frustrated and alienated I get. I'm not a very social person by nature, in fact I find social interaction with most people tedious. Consequently I don't come across many potential partners let alone people with similar kinks. Even on sites like DFN I find it difficult to mesh with people.

And the cravings, boy I know what you mean. Or at least I think I do. Even on the vanilla end of the spectrum I can't find simple things like straight slave girls forced into degrading lesbian sex, or a girl being cuckqueaned by a cruel tgirl who verbally humiliates her over how she's an inferior woman to someone who has a dick.

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