Considering your stories, I think this is nothing extraordinary.
I also have so many ideas and projects that it is impossible to do them all.
As for godhood. what matters is not our abilities but our status, among other "gods".
Torturing or being tortured is form of getting attention. and even fact that you torture someone means that you acknowledge that person as human and anything is better than being ignored.
It makes no sense to torture robots as it is no different than banging lamp post with baseball bat.
in that situation it will be same as playing with 3d models or writings stories where main goals is not to torture collection of polygons but to get reaction from other people to what you do.