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 No.3702

Ok, I feel a little awkward asking for help and describing my problem because most of you seem to get along with your sexual orientation and are at relative peace with it.
Also my english skills are not top notch(I'm german) so please cope with me.
Let's cut right to it. I'm not good at telling stories.
I love fapping to this stuff. Cute, sexy and innocent girls being slaugthered like dirty animals, tortured with no regret, snuffed, mutilated all the good stuff. I don't have to explain it to you.
Ironically, this is also what hurts me the most. Their despair, the cruelty, insensitivity of the offender and all that injustice. It feels so fundamentally wrong yet this is the exact reason why it gets me off so good.
It doesn't matter btw whether it's "just a drawing" and "not reality" as some people say. Art causes emotion. It's why we consume it I guess.
Even now just thinking about it I'm trembling. Those thoughts translate to physical pain sometimes when they're really strong. Reading your thoughts and how you feel about ryona/snuff/guro/etc. on this board for example is enough to trigger extreme arousal mixed with equally strong disgust.
Then there's hate. Hate for you and maybe myself. No offense. I really like you guys and how we share this fetish, but I can't control how I feel. Sometimes, when I'm done fapping I go full crawling mode and just wish you and every person on the planet with similar sexual interests was dead.
I know this is not the way though. I want to be loving, kind and understanding. It's this contradiction you know? And you all manage to accept who you are and what you like so casually.

Have you experienced this? What do you think? How can I cope with it? Do I need therapy?
Maybe talking to people like you irl would help? Do you have any idea how to meet them?

Thank you. This has been haunting me for years. And please don't be offended. I don't mean to do that at all.

 No.3703

Alright so first off, guy, everybody needs therapy. In the normal world, in the guro world, everybody.

Second off, the world is an imperfect place filled with imperfect people who by no fault of their own have wicked imperfections. But I remember a key thing to keep myself sane and harmless: There are those like me who have bad wants and good intentions. Then there are those who have bad intentions regardless of their wants.

People befriend one another with alterior motives, they steal not out of necessity but out of belief that they too would be stolen from, they do what is wrong and they've reasoned that it's fine and I know that I'm not like them. People rape, assault, and kill for power, self aggrandizement, and money. My pitiful and controllable lust is not so much as a droplet of a cause to think that I'm a bad person in comparison to the oceans of pain and suffering that others can and will cause for various selfish purposes.

Continuing to be introspective, also carefully judging your moral systems and accepting that you have them, and really going to therapy which is a great help for anyone, all will be good in keeping you sane.

Talking with anyone you can call a friend about yourself and your problems and your lusts, realizing that you can be accepted and appreciated and enjoyed both in spite of, and because of your interests. Being careful who you're around is important because a group of people all the same leads to bad philosophy, but learning who loves you in spite of your interests or finding people who will is helpful.

Turn inward, meditate, spend time in quiet, quiet your mind like any book or youtube video would recommend.

And really look into that therapist if you can, nobody is sane on planet earth if you ask me. It's just to crazy by it's nature.

 No.3704

If I understand it all right you are exactly interested in guro because it is wrong and doing wrong thing is what gives you pleasure, not actual suffering and mutilations.
I wonder if you woud not like child porn even more than guro because this is even more wrong.

As I noticed people who are into all that cruelty often have same feelings and in real life act like hyper moral and law abiding citizens who immediately lash out on anyone who breaks rules.
Maybe this is also reason of all that perversion because you somewhat hate yourself and when you hate someone you want to do wrong to that person so naturally you like what you think is wrong.

I think best way to deal with that is to be more forgiving to yourself and adopt idea that you are absolutely perfect, center of universe and you cannot be wrong in principle.
Then your self hate should go away and there will be no reason to do what is wrong anymore and there will be no reason to hate other people who do not hurt you.
I doubt if usual therapy can help here, because your condition is essentially narcissism and it cannot be cured you must stop hating yourself or else nothing will help.

Considering myself I am completely happy with whom I am and I love everything about myself.
I cannot remember any time in my life when I hated myself but I hate society and world in general (what probably happens to be result of the fact that if I am perfect, outside is to blame for absolutely everything whats is bad)
I like guro and loli (and also every other perversion) because it against the rules of society and I like fantasy in general because it is against rules of nature.
As coincidence now I am quite pleased with terrorism and fact that world is collapsing because that fucking society will get what it deserves LOL. I feel sad about suffering and deaths of people but I am very happy that society is being hurt.

 No.3705

>>3703
Yes, some people with a guro fetish I met have no good intentions either. They don't feel sorry at all and call me a normie for sympathizing with a picture lol.
Regardless of my moral problems concerning the views of those people, their selfish and brutal mindset is a huge turn on for me.
I practiced so much introspection and seclusion I feel like I'm falling into a bottomless pit with no answers. You're probably right though, I should be more open with others about who I am.

>>3704
I tried it and you are right.
If I imagine that I was completely perfect and then think about guro, it doesn't fascinate me any more. I don't get aroused or sick.
But it is like losing something. The enjoyment is gone. It actually makes me a little sad.
Weird.

 No.3706

This is so interesting to read as I'm in the opposite camp. My interest in guro is fueled by my narcissistic delusions. When I think about how much better I am than everything else, I just want to go murder some children to display it.

And yes I'm also one of the people who feels no guilt or regret about any of this stuff. Yet, what you wrote at the end is suspiciously familiar. When I tell myself that in fact I'm the same as everyone else, not in any way superior then I start to lose interest in guro. And I know my narcissism is unhealthy, but it makes me very sad to lose it and my guro fetish.

So perhaps for both of us it's an ego/self-esteem thing. Idk.

 No.3709

>>3706
So we're into tortured little girls because of self-esteem problems? That's hilarious!
I lose interest when gaining self-esteem and you do it when losing self-esteem.
You're here because of sadism, for me it's masochism.
It's like we're made to feed off each others mental depravation.
Maybe finding someone to unload that perverted excess of narcissistic frustration on me will help.
Because just like you I'm actually happy about having this.

 No.3710

Yeah, we're all happy that we're into snuffing out little girls, that's why we're commenting here instead of hiding in the corners. It's called

I d e n t i t y

And there's nothing wrong with having one. Dealing with the fact that we've got them, we can start dealing with some facts. Like that the people we identify as may include various conflicting ideals, and that there are parts of us which are not part of our identities, items and aspect of our personality we don't know we have.

I, for example, think of myself as "wanting to kill."

I also, however, accept the fact that I cannot kill even an animal, given the chance. Since I've come across the chance before.

Then there's a rabit hole of self assessment-- can I not kill because I'm empathic? Because of training from youth-- because I think it's bad? Yaddah, yadda, yadda.

Anyway, none of that is super useful, I dunno if it would fix anyone to hear what I just said or make them feel better, but it's some stuff.

 No.3711

>>3710
>>Yeah, we're all happy that we're into snuffing out little girls, that's why we're commenting here instead of hiding in the corners. It's called I d e n t i t y

I think this is exact opposite with those 2 guys:
maybe you and me accept our guro preferences as part of identity and protect them, but those guys seem to be ashamed of their own nature while at same time it is source of pleasure.

 No.3713

>>3710
I think I understand you. You mean that we shoudln't just identify with a fetish but that there are many different aspects of personality which sometimes correlate in weird, maybe opposing ways and that we shouldn't judge ourselves and others by just one aspect like getting a boner when people suffer.
>>3711
Exactly. I like it because it makes me feel sorry for the victims.
That's why there's probably no final solution to that inner conflict. The contrasting urges(wanting to help and wanting to let them suffer) are codependent in the sense that they become stronger and weaker together. One will never overcome the other because they are a direct result of each other.

Talking to you guys is very insightful.

 No.3715

>>3713
I had something different in mind:
You cant have opposite primary desires. It is just logically impossible. However, that contradiction can be consequence of some other desires.
According to what you say here your real desire is either to hurt yourself because of some masochism and it does not matter in what way. Or maybe like me, you want revenge for your suffering and then it also does not matter how you do that. Or maybe there is another reason and this is what matters most.

 No.3718

>>3715
I guess the two opposing factors are empathy and masochism. Both can exist at the same time in the same person, but the action they cause(help vs not help) is different. I don't have the desire to actually hurt someone. I just love watching others do it to someone innocent.
I only enjoy it because innocent little girls(or animals) are cute and dear to me(=masochism).

I also know why it's so easy for most of you now. You're no masochists and not aroused by the thought of harming yourself, doing something which is against your own morals. You actually want to do it(as revenge, you hate society and its rules, etc., or just because you like hurting people) and the only thing holding you back are good intentions or empathy, but disregarding your own good intentions is not a sexual turn-on for you. That's the fundamental difference between us.

Some days ago someone posted guro on 4chan and people started cheering and encouraging him to post more and I wondered how they can do this. They can do it because the fetish works in a different way for them while for me being against it and pointing out how wrong it is is kind of the essential key part.

 No.3719

After analyzing myself and my fantasies I've come to the conclusion that I like these fantasies because they are related to power. More specifically, the ultimate power (from my pov) to hold someones life in your hands. I'm turned on by the idea of having the possibility to shoot a girl while having sex or behead her. I'm kinda in between peril and guro with my fantasies (Image sets with before and after are my favorites). With the exception from bellow, I really feel nothing negative stemming from my fantasies as long as I know it's unreal.

The interesting part is that these fantasies only work for me as long as the characters involved have no emotional value to me (for example a few girls that I know irl or some female character from a game I like, like Ciri). Although I feel empathy for other humans, I still want to be able to apply my scenarios irl or in a realistic enough medium. When it comes to real persons that I don't personally know or feel any connection towards, I am conflicted between my desires and morality / empathy.

Intellectually I believe the world is absurd and such concepts as morality or empathy are mere human constructs, but I am human and therefore am emotionally driven and probably wouldn't go through with my fantasies.

My only solution to this conflicting existence is to find a way to fully satisfy my sexual drives in a way that doesn't harm anyone, in a simulation. Again, although I know life is meaningless and existence is absurd, emotionally I am afraid of not existing, I am imbued with the blind will to live, which is my deepest value. My life would needlessly be endangered by applying my fetishes irl. So when it comes to real people, although I feel the need to kill some bimbos to satisfy my sexual urges, I won't do it because I'm blocked emotionally (empathy) and by reason(my blind will to live and have a normal life, as free as this universe allows me to).

I can't know how much this helps, or if it helps you at all, but I've felt like pouring out some thoughts and analysis I've done on myself.

 No.3720

>>3718
Yes, those forces can drive you but what i mean is that masochism should not be limited to guro so there should be other ways you can stratify yourself, if that is true. There is no reason to be limited on hurting yourself only by going against your own empathy and watching something whats makes you sad.

Just like in my situation, anything whats goes against the rules, makes me happy

 No.3872

>>3718
I'm both a sadist and a masochist, and also pretty emphatic.

I get turned on when I feel pain, I get turned on by thoughts of being tortured. To a degree it is enjoyable. I like to cause myself pain, it is very much a turn on.
I am also a sadist, I get turned on by the thought of others in pain, or causing them pain. The thought of getting someone tied down and torturing them in a variety of ways, also very much a turn on.

I'm also emphatic, in fact, I get really in character in stories and my feelings mirror the character's feelings.
When a character in a story is tortured, I imagine myself being tortured as the character, and I also imagine myself torturing the character, it turns me on twice as much. I also imagine the tortured character enjoy it at some level or desire it, which, I guess, means I don't feel as bad about them being tortured.

It depends a bit on how it is portrayed. One thing that I generally need to enjoy my fantasies, is for the sadist to feel and portray a strong, possessive desire towards the masochist.

And then there's the matter of having a strong comprehension of the difference between what is just fiction (ethically fine) and non fiction (ethically questionable)

Outcome, I get turned on by some of the visions of the most vile tortures performed on the most innocent and vulnerable characters, and especially so when I love the tortured character
(if i don't like the character who is getting tortured, it doesn't turn me on all that much, because I can't relate to them as easily, my feelings don't mirror them, and it doesn't fulfill my masochistic urges)

I am not bothered by my fantasies.
That's kind of how it works for me. It's hard to describe because it's pretty complicated.

 No.3873

Curious...am I one of the only people that come here just to read weird manga. ie Shintaro Kago, Suehiro Maruo etc. not judging any one, but I've never used Gurochan for any sort of "sexual release" and I do in fact find you all quite strange if you get off on it, but for each their own. There are worse things in the world then fapping to some images. But at the same time, the more you do that, the more likely you feed these neurosis. Good luck with your brain health folks. But damn who knows what the fuck normal actually is.

 No.3874

>>3711
woah woah slow down
When did I say I was ashamed of this stuff? On the contrary, I'm unduly proud of my tendencies. I do recognize that narcissism, when taken to extreme, is unhealthy, but that concept seems so distant from my life...

 No.4020

>>3703
Enough said. Perfect.

There is no need for me to say anything now. Thank you for showing me that there are other people in the world that think like I do.

 No.4036

>>3702
Here's my insight into the issue, since I share the topicstarter's feelings precisely.

Why I crave guro? Because I have libido, which was altered by certain experiences in my childhood, i.e. I developed an abnormal idea of what is sexy. Since it isn't going anywhere for decades now, I'm positive that no therapy can fix these abnormal sexual stimuli, so the look of blood, gore and whatnot will always arouse me. It is INSTINCT, not governed by mind.

Why I feel disgust? I think it's because the ways of my instinct (as explained above) collide with my morals -> frustration and guilt.

Is it wrong? Apparently, if it causes the aforementioned frustration and other distress. The way you explained it, you have serious long-running mental issues. It is not WHAT you're attracted to itself that is wrong, but the DISTRESS that it brings (just as with any other mental disorder, i.e. if you were happy and carefree about it, it'd not be a disorder per se.)

Do you need therapy? Well, if you feel you could live a better life, then yes. You have a choice: feed your insatiable black hole inside your chest with guro/whatever (and tame your instinct for a while only for it to come back itching again) with all the gamma of those negative feelings you described included, or... stay away, have psychologist visits, and talk to others who have the same problem (group therapy, hardly possible in reality.)

I stay away from guro mostly, but have my comebacks every once in a while. Otherwise, if I do it daily, I feel it poison my life: give me bad thoughts, make me disinterested in reality and "normal life" as we know it, drive me into seclusion, etc. And in my case, eventually I end up disappointed with life altogether and how I cannot put my fantasies to fruition (because law -> prison), and on DRUGS which already earned me gifts like HIV and hepatitis C.

 No.4047

>>3706
Be careful with use of the word "delusion". If you are able to correctly perceive what is going on around you, then you are experiencing narcissistic fantasies. You would only be suffering from delusions if you thought things about the world around you that were factually incorrect, and most suffering from delusions have no idea because it seems logical to them.

 No.4048

>>4047
Thanks for clarifying. It's rather a mute point as these things no longer effect my life very much; developing legitimate relationships has made it much easier to deal with.

 No.4094

>It feels so fundamentally wrong

There's your problem. Accept your self or face depression.

 No.4169

>> I want to be loving, kind and understanding. It's this contradiction you know? And you all manage to accept who you are and what you like so casually.


Well....

I was this guy. I was wonderful. Now I'm hateful. I used to be angry, and now I am hateful. I used to be loving, nw... idk.

But you can definitely pursue your interests however morbid they are and be a good person without hating yourself.

Then again, you may bump shoulders with evil sickos, like who I may be any day now or many comrades of mine. Many will admit to being such, and many will pretend they are good people. But YOU can CHOOSE.

...to be a good person. If you really want.

If your fetish brings you pain, do without it for a while. Even if you come to the conclusion that it is fine and nothing is wrong with it, it serves you well to have restraint. TO hold TRUE DISCIPLINE, not the mindless obedience which may have brought many to illogical subservience, but rather your will controlling your instinct and not the other way around, while both work in conjunction and not against each other.

There is nothing so vital to fap to or consume that it is more important than your overall Self. Please, refrain from this fetish that brings you pain, and understand it better when you understand yourself.

 No.4172

Embrace the insanity, it's so much more fun.

 No.4216

>>3704

you are the sum of everything that is fucked up with the world. Please die horribly before you infect the planet.

>>4036

I am sorry for you.

I personally accept that we are damaged and licking our wounds. It helps.

 No.4217

>>3704

>

I think best way to deal with that is to be more forgiving to yourself and adopt idea that you are absolutely perfect, center of universe and you cannot be wrong in principle.

Seriously, folks like you are the reason this weakness of character spreads to general media like Funny Games movie.

I'd love to introduce a brick to that fat, smiling face of yours.

 No.4222

>>3704
Your explanation of this other person's problems is a correct part of the subconscious reasoning for narcissism.

Your description of yourself is basically a case study for a narcissist.

I want to slap you but instead I'm going to try and help you as best I can, so please, for your own sake, read and think.

Believe me—I've been there—I know. You can't change the world, but you can change yourself. So accept that society is composed of people no different from yourself. You are not special; this is a pathetic delusion.

If society is imperfect, then you are part of it, and you are imperfect. Striving to identify and diminish your own flaws is the first and most important step in influencing society and making your own life better.

If everyone, like you, decides that they themselves are perfect and society is evil, this causes the evil which you and everyone sees all around them. To separate the individual from society is fallacious and nonsensical.

Admitting and working against your own narcissism will make you happier than you can currently understand, because as perfect as your life may seem, it is an empty facade. You are not the secure mask you show to the world—you are the truth, helpless and tiny in the face of enormities. A person may become truly strong by engaging in their world, not by rejecting it.

 No.4225

>>4222
You have totally wrong idea about narcissism, because narcissism is precisely self-hate and assumption that you are horrible and worthless. thinking that YOU are center of the universe is exact opposite of narcisim.

Narcissism is not loving yourself, but loving your image which you present to other people. That image is perfect for narcissist and he will sacrifice everything just for that fake character he made up.

Putting yourself in the center of universe means that you assume position when you are one who sets the meaning of existence so that you will focus on changing word the way which will give most happiness to you
There is absolutely no point to change yourself besides making yourself better and getting more power to change world in way that it will suit you.

Of course you have to work on fixing your flaws but you define those flaws yourself according to how you feel and not try to change yourself into some abstract being created by someone else and especially not into ideal character created by society.

There is no need to separate yourself from society you can treat it as air/water around you which exists and has to be taken into account. sometimes it is useful sometimes it can be deadly. The main goal is precisely to learn how to deal with society and surrounding world.

and also society is not same as individual people society is abstract organism made of humans just like we are made of cells. Which actually cares about people just as much as we care about our individual cells.

 No.4230

Personally I work off my rage that I cant express in daily life, on guro.

I'm angry, but at least I admit I am a flawed, angry being. I know that enjoying blood, death and cannibalism IS wrong, and I try to melt-dilute-canalize it as much as I can.

I'm not the center of the universe. No one is. How can a person even imagine this, in an endless universe of endless stars, planets and possibilities?

 No.4233

>>4230
I'm not the center of the universe. No one is. How can a person even imagine this, in an endless universe of endless stars, planets and possibilities?

Why not? can you tell where is the center of infinity?
it can be absolutely anywhere you like. Where else you are going to put your point of reference?
Also we can treat ourselves as brain in the vat which is connected to infinite computer simulation out reality.

Main issue is how do you know what is right or wrong? What objective proof anyone can provide that death or cannibalism is any more from than for example charity work.

You have problem of split personality where your true self is repressed and angry so it seeks revenge. (That is probably why you like guro in first place.) your fake virtual personality constructed by society thinks that your true self is despicable and should be repressed or destroyed.
If that will happen you will become narcissist, a person whose true self is dead and cannot feel anything in life besides pride and shame.

 No.4238

>>4225
Nothing you've said contradicts 4222. A narcissist may often mistakenly think the image they present is their true self, worship "themselves" and simultaneously hate the reality of who they are. Self-hate is part of narcissism, but it can also exist independently and the inflated self image is the key distinguishing feature...
>There is no need to separate yourself from society
You are basically repeating what 4222 said.
As for the bit about society, again, this is all compatible with what 4222 said.
>society is not same as individual people
No one said it was. But it's composed of nothing but individuals.
>society is abstract organism made of humans just like we are made of
>cells. Which actually cares about people just as much as we care about
>our individual cells
Um I don't care about my individual cells. Where did you get this idea? Before cells were discovered, did people somehow already care about them? And society doesn't have the agency to"know" anything, much less care in an objectively observable manner. Neither do people.

In fact, conceptualizations like identity or society don't exist in any objective sense. They're just probabilistic, observable trends utilized by the mind.

 No.4240

>>4238
>>Nothing you've said contradicts 4222. A narcissist may often mistakenly think the image they present is their true self, worship "themselves" and simultaneously hate the reality of who they are. Self-hate is part of narcissism, but it can also exist independently and the inflated self image is the key distinguishing feature...

There is no question which is true and which is fake self, true self is one which feels emotions. so it impossible not to know which is real.

so if you look into naked prepubescent and get aroused that means you are pedophile while your fake self may be someone who thinks that this is wrong. but not because it feels wrong but because it believes that it is wrong.
same is valid for gay who believes that being gay is wrong.

Problem of narcissist is that only true self can give pleasure and feel emotions. If narcist completely represses his true self he is doomed to live miserable life without other pleasure than pride and revenge.

If you worship (if that word is even usable here) your true self you are not narcist, only if you worship your image you are narcissist.
Also this grandiosity thing is not so much about inflated self-image but about importance of that self-image. it is mostly belief that what you do has importance in the great scale. while focusing on your true self, means that screw great scale, I only care to feel good and everything else may burn in hell.

>>No one said it was. But it's composed of nothing but individuals.

Human is composed of nothing else but individuals primitive cells so it is completely valid analogy


>>Um I don't care about my individual cells. Where did you get this idea? Before cells were discovered, did people somehow already care about them? And society doesn't have the agency to"know" anything, much less care in an objectively observable manner. Neither do people.


What I mean is that we do not care about fate of individual cells. We do not care if some of our cell will die or we may even perform mass genocide with chemotherapy if we need to cure cancer to survive.
And society does same, it does not care what will happen to you.

>>In fact, conceptualizations like identity or society don't exist in any objective sense. They're just probabilistic, observable trends utilized by the mind.


if you want to play that kind of philosophical nonsense then yes nothing exists

But for practical purposes society exists and it can treated like multicellular organism with certain behavior. Behavior of that organism is totally different from behavior of individual people and people have little controll over behavior of that organism

 No.4250

I think u misunderstand. We agree on all the issues being discussed here, except on the few where you reversed your position entirely in order to create an argument. All I was saying is that you don't actually disagree with anything I said. I maintain every point I've made, and I agree with every point you've made. Why are you still trying to start a debate?

 No.4256

You have problem of split personality where your true self is repressed and angry so it seeks revenge. (That is probably why you like guro in first place.) your fake virtual personality constructed by society thinks that your true self is despicable and should be repressed or destroyed.
If that will happen you will become narcissist, a person whose true self is dead and cannot feel anything in life besides pride and shame.

Oh jesus.

> your true self is repressed and angry so it seeks revenge.


so clooooose!

>your fake virtual personality constructed by society thinks that your true self is despicable and should be repressed or destroyed.


and miss...

I know all this shit is horrible. And I know it's born of chaos, and repressed pain and injustice, things that slip through cracks and flaws of civilization.

I claim that in a clean and just world with no genetic disorders of mind and body, none of this would be rampant. I simply blame it on chaos in the universe. A wrong mix of genetic combination and certain trauma events creates a monster or psychopath

 No.4257

All this shit is wrong but better fap or indulge in them than repress it further to damage my brain.

Basically , Gurochan is my barfbag

 No.4356

OP the fact that youre having such a moral dilemma points to you being a good, kind person i believe. i dont think bad people worry over whether theyre a bad person or not.

its strange, i dont have any bad feelings about guro... i dont feel gross for liking it, and i dont feel like i'm venting anger, or like i'm punishing myself or feeding something narcissistic or unhealthy, or anything like that. i think when i first started getting into it, it made me feel sick. but now ive seen so much that it doesnt affect my mood. only real suffering makes me feel sick now. i do not want real people to suffer (unless it's like a consensual BDSM thing).

i'd say the feeling i get when i see guro is like a fluttery, love feeling? i'm super bloodthirsty but i also like feeling pity, empathy, etc and like i want to take care of the person thats getting these horrible things forced on them. i want to be the one that breaks you apart but also pieces you back together (though i'll happily settle for just breaking you apart). it feels really really good. i'd go so far as to say it's blissful or heavenly. i love guro almost more than anything else. it doesnt feel wrong at all.
i wrote a rape/torture fanfiction that got surprisingly popular and it has lots of comments saying how i "triggered" someone or made them cry, throw up, shake, or in one case even feel so sick that they didnt go into work the next day. those comments seem so silly to me. no one real is getting hurt so i dont see a reason to get so upset. i'm glad that it also has lots of comments saying that they loved it and my writing is good, or i might have started feeling guilty or some self-hatred about it like some other people here. i'm not the most mentally healthy person but i'm definitely not a bad person, and i dont think that guro contributes to my depression, anxiety, bpd, etc. if anything it helps because it's a stress reliever.

reading about these different experiences with our shared interest is really fascinating. i hope the OP and everyone who relates to them can make peace with themselves.

 No.4371

>>4356
>i wrote a rape/torture fanfiction that got surprisingly popular
Mind telling us which?



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