Honestly. Many years ago, when i found a first dolcett picture, i thought, that everyone want to be killer. That it is normal. But i soon found that i don´t. That i want die for someone and die for his/her pleasure. To be hanged, suffocated, or killed like a real pig, it tempts me much more. And as time goes, this my desire is bigger and bigger. Is here more people, who love dolcett, snuff and want to be a victim only, to suffer and die?
I can relate to your experience Jiva. When I started writing, I thought that "killers" would enjoy reading it. But it turns out that a lot of my readers are women who enjoy seeing themselves as the victim. So I can say that you are certainly not alone.
Obviously you are not alone. There are lots(relatively speaking) of women and some men who have similar fantasies especially when they can get all benefits without actually suffering and dying ;) in fact people willing to be victims seem to be even more common for some reason.
Actually it is the same thing to some degree, because killer usually also thinking about the feelings of the victim and that is the main motivation they both fell similar things.
Taking the role of the victim is nothing more than being lazy attention seeker ;)
Many will be Ok with switching those roles.
So being victim or killer is not that important, what matters much more is if you are narcissist or borderline.
As if you want to have public or personal attention.
as I noticed there are the majority of borderline victims, a bit less borderline sadists, and then very few narcissistic killers and almost none of the narcissistic victims.
I personally can imagine myself
only as the sadist in the
But I have had a lot of
opportunity talking to members
of the masochist-fraction.
Very very fun experience.
I as a sadist,
want to amplify the demise of
the victim that I am 'working' on.
I think a lot about what goes on in
the mind of the opposite site,
trying to 'push' the victim
even harder to the limits.
the victim is my center of interest.
As I have experienced,
there are many masochists out there,
many of them female.
Altough there are different
motivations for being the victim,
they all seem to have some kind
of 'tease-and-please' character
attached to them.
I believe that It's all about the
sweet toxic emotional cocktail
of two entirely opposite feelings.
desire/pleasure <> killing
'Destroying what you like most.'
Well, I never really daydreamed about
killing my ex-collegue.
She was ugly, annoying and had a
bad mouth smell.
But for women I find attractive:
'Ey yo, bb, you nice,
wanna die for me, huh?;
Yes, I see myself mostly as a spectator too. That seems natural in my own stories, as I'm the narrator, and mostly the deaths are by machine anyway.